Some videos for your viewing pleasure...

In Cozumel, Mike thought he'd video me doing laps so Sara could see how hard I was training....




And here we are back at home in the perpetual winter...

What I've Been Up To....

• I have FINALLY felt what it means to "catch" the water. Yes, you read that correctly...I have to admit, all that talk about "feeling the water," etc is not bull$hit! You really can feel it when you get it right. Go figure! LOL. Oddly enough, I first *got* the catch whilst doing lots and lots of backstroke. (Yes, I like to do things backwards. Hahahahahahaha!)

• I am running! And in a new jazzy pair of orthotics. :) :)

• Made up new nicknames for my two kitty cats: Mandalay and Peanut are now also known as 100G and P-Dog. LMAO!! This delights me to no end. Even better -- when I called my Mom and told her the new nicknames and she responded, "But Peanut is a cat." HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Awesome!! (100G is because Mandalay weighed in at the vet's 100 grams more than last time. I still think I was soooo clever to think of this. Hahaha!)
  

• I almost sliced the top of my thumb off when I chose not to use the safety device when cutting yam chips on the mandolin. (Why do I need to use the safety, how bad could it be....OW!! Holy CRAP.) Then, I went to emergency and learned that stitches were not an option, so I walked out of the hospital with a couple of bandaids wrapped around my thumb. Yes...I went to emergency to get a bandaid put on my thumb. I AM ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE! (Insert extreme embarassment and red face here.)

• I now wrap my thumb in saran wrap and pink duct tape so I can continue to swim...Yes, I was a sight to see at the pool this morning.
  

• Found my new go-to daily web site: www.cuteoverload.com. ***Warning. Extreme cute pics and videos of puppies, kittens, deer, jumping lambs (YES, jumping and leaping LAMBS! SO FRIGGING CUTE! Hahahaha!), and all other manner of creatures large and small.**** Seriously, the world can use more light-hearted images and major cuteness.

• I found this recipe on the internet and it is very, very good. I mean very effing good. You have got to try it:

6 TBSP Coconut oil (I added a bunch more because it didn't look like
enough and it worked out awesome.)
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 1/2 TBSP Cocoa powder (I just eyeballed it)
1 TBSP maple syrup
2 TBSP shredded coconut
1/4 cup almonds chopped up fine (I threw them in a blender)

Scoop out a bunch of coconut oil and melt it in a pot. Whisk in vanilla, cocoa, maple syrup until completely dissolved. Whisk in remaining ingredients. Pour mixture into pan lined with parchment and tilt pan to let the runny mixture coat it. Place in freezer and wait 15 minutes. OMG ----- SO GOOD. Snap off desired size of piece and enter a blissful realm of delciousness. (Credit for this recipe: www.realfoodliving.com/recipes/coconut-bark-almond-joy)

• I eat more than other people do on long bike rides. I was at a spin class a few weeks ago -- (3 hour and 40 minute ride) and I went through a number of bananas and Welch's gummies. There was a woman who competes on the national bike team who was spinning just behind me. After I don't know how many bananas, she asked me, "Your stomach can handle that many bananas?" Yes Ma'am, my stomach can handle all that and even more! Hahahahahaah!

I respond well to food! :) :) :)

The Red Finger

I was finally inspired to make a new blog entry today...I'd written a friend an email, and LO! I was struck with inspiration.

This is my inspiration......or shall I say my confession?

I have a raging hunger that goes on in my belly all the time. Ever since I started this Ironman thing, my appetite has literally grown exponentially. When I first met my better half, he used to pick off my plate: according to him I "ate like a bird."

I honestly don't remember things that way. I've always enjoyed food, and I don't want to give the impression that before Ironman, I picked at my food. I ate with gusto. I still do. However, the quantities of food that I can eat now scares me sometimes.

I'll eat just about anything when the hunger starts. Like a garburetor. Throw it down the chute. I'm not picky. I don't care if there is a little mold on the bread. I'll pick it off.

Seriously.

The time at the Penticton Phat camp (2 years ago) where I ate green potatos (because I didn't want to throw them out) and got such bad gas on the ensuing bike ride, that when I thought I was alone (at a set of lights in Penticton) I let one rip....and saw to my horror, a woman sitting outside her place -- on the patio. Her head whipped around, and I made some lame joke. Oh my GAWD, my face was beet red -- thank goodness I had my sunglasses and helmet on...they made me feel protected. Eeeeeeeeep.

I digress...

I'd like to address one of my hunger's serious attacks. I call it, The Craving. The Craving will hit me out of the blue....well not right out of the blue. I mean, there is obviously a reason for The Craving (like a 3 hour hilly bike ride) or a big training week; however, for some reason, the clarity and insight with which I (like to think) I apply to other aspects of my life completely disappear when it comes to The Craving.

When The Craving hits, I go out of my mind. It's like a light switch is flipped inside of me and I go barreling through the kitchen cupboards, the freezer, the fridge...looking. Looking for something --- anything to satisfy The Craving.

Like most good little athletes, I make a point not to purchase junk food -- because I will eat it if it is in the house. This strategy is very good for nutritional purposes but not so good for The Craving. Because The Craving will always hit at the most inopportune time. Like when it is minus 40 frigging below and I really really want some ketchup chips but I don't want to go the store.

So I search the cupboards instead. Knowing there is nothing there, but looking nonetheless. Well, that is not entirely accurate. There is always something there, and I can get pretty creative (in a very gross way) when it comes to addressing The Craving.

Like yesterday...I opened all the cupboards, searching, searching. And then I found a half used can of Gatorade powder. Oh yeah baby. I took that tub and I licked my finger and I dunked it in there again and again. Licking the powder off my finger like a popsicle.

Oh man, I couldn't stop. It wasn't exactly GREAT. But it was GOOD. Mmmmm. Unfortunately, the red dye that was in the Gatorade powder dyed my entire forefinger bright red. As well as my tongue. But I can hide my tongue. I can't hide my finger.

My finger nail was dyed red too. And no amount scrubbing and washing could remove the redness. What the heck is in that powder anyways?!?!?!

For the rest of the day my finger reproached me. When I would type an email, the bright red finger stood out amongst my other white fingers. I didn't want to go out in public -- someone might see my finger and ask, "Why is your one finger so red?"

Or even worse, people might not say anything at all. I can just see it -- me standing in line at the grocery store, putting all my items on the conveyor belt trying to use my right forefinger as little as possible (I'm right-handed). Then, catching people looking at my finger of shame. Seeing the "WTF?" expression in their eyes. And then not saying anything to me. AAARRRGGHHHH!

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So you think you have it bad....

This little animal is called the Naked Mole Rat and is from North Africa...


So if you are having a bad day and feeling sorry for yourself, remember: It could be worse, you could look like an old penis with buck teeth.

Stay Thirsty, My Friends...

If he were a triathlete.....

* He does not need to sight during the swim, as the fish guide him.

* He did his first Iron-distance race on a mountain bike...and won.

* On trail runs, small woodland animals come out to watch him.

* Lifeguards clear a lane for his sole use every morning.

* In the off season, he climbs Mt. Everest.

* The carrots in his refrigerator peel themselves.


He is....

The Most Interesting Triathlete in the World....

Be My Swim Coach for the Day!

....and you too can be bribed with coffee and baked goodies!! :) :) :)

Keith has been the first to take the challenge: at the spur of the moment yesterday, he drove the 2+ hours from Calgary and met me at the Pincher Creek pool for a private one on one lesson! Hee-hee!

He even brought his iPhone and took the above footage after all our work...(Santa also came early and brought me an underwater camera! Can't wait to start using that!!)

My swimming needs all the help it can get -- I cobbled together a stroke as an adult -- never took any learn-to-swim lessons, etc. (In hindsight, maybe I should have.) Thus, my "stroke" (using that term very loosely), is a combination of watching youtube videos, of absorbing advice from swim coaches, from lifeguards, from anyone who is faster than me.

The "catch" in swimming is something that I have been trying so hard to understand/feel. Like I was telling Keith yesterday, I HATE it when swimmers (aka people who were in swim club as kids) tell me to "feel" the water, that it "will feel so effortless" -- blah, blah, blah. That kind of talk is like someone going on about religion -- just TRUST in things, have FAITH, etc. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know all that stuff, but what in the hell is it supposed to FEEL like?!?!?!?!

Everything feels awkward to a new adult swimmer -- yes, even one that has been trying to swim for the past 6 years!

Thus, 2011 is the year of the swim stroke. Enough faffing around for me -- I am going to FEEL it baby. :)

Wanna be my coach for the day? I make good on my bribes!!!! LOL!!!!

Totally Unacceptable